No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
