He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
17 year olds will be the death of me.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
