Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
