You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
