they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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