I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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