Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You smell like stripper and shame
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
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