Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
