Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
