I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I just found a bag of teeth...
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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