Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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