the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
In America we eat man semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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