So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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