I wanna passion pit in your ass
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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