Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
