Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
