I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
