Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
