so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
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On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
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This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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