She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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