margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
