How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
