my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
