Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
