Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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