How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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