I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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