Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Still dying that you shit outside
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.