How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
