May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we're making bets on your personal life
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
