Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
