Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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