would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize