and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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