so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
