What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
