And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
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