I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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