eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Randomize
