I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
