He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
