I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
We talked him into tasing himself.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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