Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
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For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
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Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.