Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I showed him my bush... on skype.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
sarcasm needs its own font
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
But break dance skills will only take you so far
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug