I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
