he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize