I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
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