Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize