id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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