I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
You were trust falling into bushes
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
