Yo dont text me then not text me
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
