Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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