i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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